Relationships should be symbiotic. We are all created to give, and to receive. To care, and to be cared for. To love, and to be loved. It is not powerful to not need anything from anyone. You cannot create relationships if you have no needs. You cannot create love without having a need for it.
As a Dean I learned to love and support others while keeping myself safe. It is okay to leave the room when someone else is hurting themselves to the extent that they might cause you pain as they work through their stuff. You have permission to keep yourself at a safe distance while still loving an supporting someone else.