I have been thinking a lot about my clients as I prepare for the New Year. I've been listening with my heart and I am finding that many people want to DO things in 2019: save money, be in an serious relationship, start a business, write a book, or get a new job. I get it. There is so much to do! And, yes, goal-setting matters (Friendly reminder: B. Well offers workshops on goal-setting). It is important to have relational, financial, and professional goals for the year. Having a vision matters. You need a vision to know where you are going, and to know when you have arrived.
As you prepare for the New Year, I challenge you to move away from what you want to have or do, and focus on what you seek to experience. These are things that are more spiritual in nature. You might not be able to hold them in your hand, or hang them on your wall, but they can be had no matter what the year brings. Instead of writing specific financial goals, you could write, "This year I choose to experience financial peace and abundance." Whether you get into a committed relationship or not, 2019 could be the year in which, "I will know love." Instead of focusing on writing a book, be willing to become a writer. Move away from getting a promotion, and focus on becoming a leader. If you focus on the experience, you can not lose. The promotion is theirs to give you, but the leadership skills are yours whether you are promoted or not. The relationship might work, and it might not. But did you experience yourself as loving? Were you able to receive love from someone else? Set yourself up to win in 2019 by losing the expectations and opening to the experience. What is it that you seek to experience in 2019?
Here's your work to prepare for the New Year:
If you are a B. Well Client, you have a journal. If you're not one yet, go ahead and get a journal now. Write down 5-10 things that you would like to experience in this year: peace, love, joy, adventure, sexual freedom, improved friendships, financial well-being, deepened spirituality, or happiness. How would you like to experience yourself: Is this the year you will use your voice? Expand your leadership skills? Create more time for your family? Accept your body? Be open to what the year brings and commit to finding what you seek wherever it is available. If you are open to experiencing more love in 2019, do not limit yourself to romantic-love, focus on all the love that will come your way: the man who helps carry your groceries, the public acknowledgement from the church, a gift on your desk from an anonymous co-worker...love will be present; will you be open to receiving it in whatever form it comes? Remember to write all of the things you would like to experience in the affirmative. Esther Jno-Charles reminds us, "What you focus on expands. So focus on what you want, not what you do not want." I hope each of you make well-being something you would like to experience.
My prayer is that you might know the joys of mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical wellness and well-being. Are you willing to do the work to get from where you are to where you want to be? Remember, you can heal yourself. B. Well is here for you as create your best life. Let's get ready for the New Year!
Dr. Adrianne R. Pinkney,
Integrative Wellness & Life Coach